This memory video was my gift to your Daddy. I knew I was going to marry him the very first time I met him!
Dear Briella, Gianna, and Micah,
Anyone who is married and being completely honest with their self can
agree that marriage is blood, sweat, and tears. No, I’m not saying it’s “blood,
sweat, and tears” in the literal sense, but what I'm saying is, it's not always easy. Likewise, it's not always going to be hard. In fact, there are going to be months,
maybe even years at a time, that are easy, simple, breezy, and nothing but pure
joy; however, we have gone through a season, or two, (or three? 😉) where it’s not
always joy. In fact, there are times it’s downright confusing, worrisome,
lonesome, or saddening. Some people will say, or tell you, that marriage is 50/50. I'm here to tell you that marriage is 100/100. While we are partners who are supposed to 'share' in life, we are also supposed to give of ourselves fully. And, newsflash, it's not always easy to think of someone else before yourself.
So, let’s just say, in ten years’ time, we have definitely
walked through ALL the seasons. And, let’s just say, in hindsight, I’m grateful we have done
just that; though, during that rough season, it wasn't enjoyable. We have laughed together, we have cried together, we have argued and
said words we regret, we have been crushed by a miscarriage, stared down the
possibility of Briella dying while resisting it in faith together, moved across
state lines not once, but twice, we have agreed to disagree over a few topics, we don’t always
speak the love language that the other craves, and defensiveness and pride
still champion more than we probably like to admit. And these are just a “few”
of the things that aren’t perfect about us. Yikes.😬
But what is imperfectly perfect about us is that we realize
we are humans that make mistakes and that need God’s grace and mercy upon each
other on a daily basis. Those topics that we may not always completely agree
upon, we almost always 😉 can find a Godly compromise. Except a vasectomy. I still can't get your Dad to agree to that after all these years. 😐 Those early years arguments that we said regretful
words, we hugged tighter afterward and have learned to never say them again. When
we took a huge leap of faith and moved out of state, with a 7 month-old baby who
wasn’t fully recovered from her lung issue, we had no idea how isolating it
would be to leave our family. In the long run, we would reap the benefits of having to run
to each other because of it. When one of us is sinking, the other puts out a
hand; even if it comes in the form of gifting a nap on the couch. (It’s the
little things, I tell you! J).
When the world around us seems to be crumbling and hating each other at a speed-of-light
pace, we know we can find peace and love in our safe life we've built together because of the gift of commitment God
has blessed us with and the family we have created from it.
Ten years hasn’t brought us a perfect marriage in any
stretch, but it has given us much more appreciation and grace and mercy about one another
that we didn’t have years ago.
In a post I wrote on Facebook, I said this:
When I look at this picture, I see a couple eagerly (yet nervously) entering a union that they thought they were prepared for, but would realize they weren’t as prepared as they would like to admit. I see a couple that thought they knew so much about each other, but would realize they had so much more to learn. I see a couple that thought every day was going to be easy, but would realize there would be bumps in the road.
When I see us today, I don’t see those same “kids”. Jim’s hair is beginning to glisten and 7 years of motherhood sleeplessness has contoured my countenance. But with all the visual changes aside, I see beyond that into our hearts. When I see us today, I see a couple that has encountered trials, fears, and tears; however, those moments have been overshadowed by love, commitment, devotion, and ultimately, God’s prevailing grace.
When I see this picture, I remember thinking 10 years seemed so far away, but it’s almost here and I can hardly believe it! All I can say is, I’m so very grateful for Jim, I feel fortunate for the life we share, and the family we've created together.
